When Endings lead to Beginnings

I just crossed a first off of life’s list this morning: I filed my initial claim for unemployment. Being jobless is a box I would rather not have checked, but at the same time I am confident this is a moment in time that is going to afford me new opportunities and it reminds me I have a lot to be thankful for.

First, I got to work closely with my family for ten out of the sixteen years we published. I got to watch my dad’s dream grow into a magazine that was enjoyed by a lot of people from various walks of life. I had a job in my chosen career field while I was in college. And I have been able to continue growing my skills in the years since.

As hard as it is to see something you’ve put so much effort into building fade into a memory, and as much as it stinks that we had to make this decision during a season that’s supposed to be merry and bright, it seems fitting that closing the doors at Model Railroad News comes at the end of the year.  A lot of people think 2012 will be the year the world ends. Personally, I’m looking at it as a year of beginnings.

It’s a universal truth: In order for new beginnings to take place, there has to be endings. A seed has to die for a flower to grow. The flower blooms and withers to create a new seed. A caterpillar has to enter the chrysalis and shed its former self in order to emerge a butterfly. I sometimes wonder: If the seed and the caterpillar could think and feel the way humans do, would there be fear or doubt as they enter their metamorphosis?

In nature, change is just a part of the life cycle. For humans, its something we tend to shun.  We may not necessarily like where we are in life, but it’s what we know  — and there is comfort in familiarity. But if our routine never changes we face stagnation. I’ve come to the conclusion that just as stagnation results in death in nature, it’s deadly for the human soul as well.

Like so many others without a steady job right now, I have absolutely no idea what’s next. Maybe I’m insane. Maybe I’m still in shock. But I’m excited. There is an entire realm of possibility available to me now. There are new challenges to face. New lessons to learn. And new adventures to be had.

In The Hobbit, Bilbo Baggins tells Gandalf that adventures are horribly uncomfortable things and he was happy to stay in his hobbit home for the rest of his life. Gandalf in his wisdom recognizes these to be the words of someone who isn’t as content about his life as he claims, but rather who is too afraid to step out his front door. Of all the companions who journeyed to the Lonely Mountain, Bilbo was the most bold and vigilant. While the others got discouraged and lost their way, he came to life. The only thing he’d needed was a good nudge in the right direction to get him moving.

I see myself the same way. I’ve always dreamed of visiting the unknown but have hesitated to step over the threshold, and I have often used my job and my family as my excuse. Like Bilbo, I now find myself running out the door without any clue of where I’m going. I may meet some trolls, goblins, elves, and dragons along the way, but they’ll give me some interesting stories to tell. And I can’t wait to share them. You never know who those tales will inspire!

Note to self: It’s pretty cold out there right now. Remember your hat!

 

30 Days of Thankfulness in Writing – Day 10: Mom & Dad

It’s easy to focus on the negative in the world around us. In observation of a month many dedicate to counting their blessings, I’ve started a 30-day challenge in which I’ll focus on one aspect of my writing life for which I am thankful. I’d love to have you join by sharing about something that has blessed your own writing life in the comments section below. - Jen

I really have my parents to thank for me becoming an active writer. After burning myself out my junior year of college my dad put me to work helping him at the family business. And I have learned more than just how to be a writer and editor as a result.

See, dad’s been in publishing in some form or other since I was a kid. First he moderated an electronic bulletin board back in the mid-80s, and he produced a small Atari Computer-related newsletter that eventually grew into a magazine. He eventually went to work for Atari’s in-house publication but found himself unexpectedly unemployed in the spring of 1992 when the company closed down its home computing department. After that he was approached by his former printer back in Oregon who ultimately ended up investing in my dad and helped him start Model Railroad News in 1995.

Working for a train magazine was never something I aspired to while growing up. To be fair, writing wasn’t on the agenda either. But here I was in the midst of a major life crisis and dad had a problem of his own, his long-time editor had decided to change everything about his life — including his family — and left without giving any notice. Needing something to do, I offered to help out with some simple projects until dad found a replacement, which we did more quickly than we expected. He was a retired teacher, a self-professed train nut, and an avid storyteller and writer. The one stipulation was that I stick around to do some of the editorial slog work. I had to keep busy somehow, so I agreed and found myself employed as an editorial assistant.

I learned more about War Bonnets and the Galloping Goose (nothing to do with birds or horses!), 3-bay hoppers and tank cars, and other railroad-related facts than I ever wanted to know. I also learned a lot about our nation’s history as a result. (Few people these days realize just how big a role the railroad played in the development of the United States.) Starting out, my main job was writing new product announcements for various manufacturers, which taught me the importance of conveying information in a clear and concise manner. I also began honing my editing skills by helping with the final copy edit of each issue. In the spring of 2002 I left the science world behind and signed up as and English and Writing major. My life as a writer began.

As with any job there are perks and pitfalls when it comes to working for a family-run business — for one, it’s always the main topic at family gatherings — but what I was learning in school complemented what I was doing at work, and vice versa. By the time I graduated two years later I had something most of my peers did not: actual work experience in my field of study. However, doing research I found most of the openings were looking for five years of experience, so I committed to working for the family for another three years.

Life happens and come January those three years will have stretched into eight, giving me my 10-year pin at LampLight Publishing. I have worked my way up the ladder to a Managing Editor position and get to torture my younger sister who became my editorial assistant to help pay her way through college.  Yes, there have been arguments and plenty of head butting along the way, but there have also been some incredible blessings. I’ve been able to continue my education through writing programs such as The Christian Writers Guild. I’ve been given time off to attend Writers Conferences. I’m able to take occasional personal days just because I want to write. And I’ve been able to be really involved in youth ministry, which I absolutely love with all my heart.

I’ll be the first to admit I don’t always like the subject matter of my job. There are also days I worry people won’t take me seriously because my parents sign my paycheck. (My Senior Editors have all been unrelated and taskmasters in their own right, by the by.) However, if it weren’t for this job I would never have dared to dream I could make my way through the world with a pen, a notebook, and an eye for details. 

As is true of many small business these days, things are really tight for our little publishing company, but we continue to press on, chugging up the hill like the Brave Little Steam Engine facing this economic downturn with determination one breath at a time (sorry, couldn’t resist). And my parents continue to encourage me to pursue the things in life I love most.

So mom and dad, in case I’ve never truly expressed my gratitude before, thanks! Thanks for giving me an experience not many parents can offer to their children. And thanks for helping me find where my true talents lie.